9 Ways to be the Favorite Visitor

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Having a new baby is such an exciting time! If you are a hopeful visitor just itching to meet that sweet new babe, this is for you.

9 Ways to Be the Favorite Visitor

1. Wait until you are invited

   Texts have gone out, Facebook announcement made, the baby is here! You cannot wait to meet the new baby in person. Before you rush over to the family’s home (or hospital room), wait for them to extend an invitation. The family may want time to learn all of the details of their baby. They may need time to rest/recover before welcoming visitors.

2. Bring a meal

   The immediate postpartum period is exhausting. Feeding themselves (or other children) is just one more item on a parent’s to-do list. A visitor that comes bearing a warm meal can be such a help. Be sure to check for allergies. Bonus points if you use disposable containers and bring disposable plates/cutlery.

3. Stay away if you’re sick

   Hopefully, this is a no-brainer. If you are sick, think you are sick, have the sniffles that you are sure are “just allergies,” then stay away! Please don’t risk getting the family sick.

4. Wait to be offered to hold the baby

   You are so excited to snuggle the baby, but pause before you rush to take baby from mom’s arms. You may think you are doing mom a favor by holding the baby, but it may just add to her stress. She may enjoy that sweet baby and may be feeling a little selfish. That is okay! Take the opportunity to play with older siblings. If a family offers you the chance to hold the baby, then snuggle away…after you wash your hands!

5. Only give advice if asked

   Newborns come with a learning period. The family may feel like they are rocking this postpartum period or they may feel completely overwhelmed. Regardless, emotions can be high and even the most well meaning advice may not be well received.

6. Support the family’s choices

   This one goes hand in hand with number 5. Assume the family loves the baby dearly, has done their research, and is doing what they think is best…even if it’s not the way you did it. Respect the differences.

7. Do something nice for mom

   Would you like a cup of tea? Can I rub your back? I brought you chocolate. You are doing an amazing job. You are enough. Would you like a break or time to yourself? Say any of the above to a new mom and quickly move up the list of favorite visitors.

8. Do a chore while you’re there

   This one will earn you some major bonus points, greatly raise your chances of being invited back, and almost guarantee you become the favorite visitor. Look around. Are there dishes? Laundry? Errands to run? Be useful.

9. Keep the visit short

   Watch the clock while visiting a family. Try to keep your visit to 30 minutes at most. Remember that newborns eat often; mom may be trying to establish breastfeeding. The family may want a nap. Leave before overstaying your welcome, and you will be well on your way to becoming the family’s favorite visitor!